idola

Ryner tilted his umbrella up and looked through the rain. There he was - a man standing alone in the rain, in the darkness, without an umbrella. His hair and clothes were absolutely soaked. He started straight at Ryner, but his expression didn’t react to his presence. 

He was laughing. Or maybe he was sobbing.

“…Sion?”

“…Ryner.” It was hard to tell what kind of emotion his voice carried through the deafening rain.  

“You’re gonna catch a cold standing out here without an umbrella, you know?”

Sion looked up at the sky. It was like he’d only just noticed that it was raining. “Hm? Oh… oh, yeah.”

“What’s with you… uh, anyway, come here. You can use my umbrella.” He held his umbrella up so Sion could come under too. Though it was a pretty meaningless gesture, considering he was already soaked to the bone… But still. There was no reason for him to keep standing there in the rain. “C’mon, get in.”

Sion didn’t even look at him. He just continued to stare up at the dark sky.

“Heeey,” Ryner said and scowled. “Seriously, what’s with you?”

If Sion wouldn’t come to him, he’d go to Sion. Ryner took a step towards him.

“…Mm?”

Ryner raised his umbrella up a little higher to get a better look at his surroundings. Because of the rain, it was difficult to see and hear anything around him.

All he could see was darkness. All he could hear was rain, wind, and the occasional roar of thunder. He couldn’t sense any other people, either. But that went without saying. There normally weren’t too many people around here at this time of day anyway, and the fact that it was pouring only made it emptier.

Ryner concentrated on the thunder. On the darkness.

“So?” Ryner said. “What’re you gonna make me work on this time?”

Sion looked at him. But Ryner couldn’t make his emotion out through the rain. Was he laughing? Crying? Smiling in his usual annoying way?

Ryner took another step closer. “Even though you said our work was over.”

“It is.”

Another step closer. “Then what did you need?”

“…I had the sudden urge to see you,” Sion said jokingly. Maybe it was because of the strong winds, but his voice seemed to shiver.

Another step closer. “What’re you saying?”

“I’m serious.”

“And I’m always telling you that that’s gross.”

“Haha.”

Another step. Another step. Then he stopped. Because he was close enough to see Sion’s expression now.

“……”

Ryner gazed into Sion’s expression. He was smiling as he stood, pelted by heavy rain. He looked happy. He looked like he was enjoying it. Yet tears were streaming down his face.

“Are you crying?” Ryner asked.

“No.”

“It looks like you are.”

“That’s just the rain.”

“Is it?”

“It is,” Sion said and nodded, that same smile still on his face.

“Hmm.” True, there were times when rain might land like tears. “So? What are you gonna do… to me now?”

Ryner looked around again. This time, he was surrounded by countless peoples’ murderous intent. Then he looked back at Sion and his unwavering smile. His sad smile. His pained smile.

“…I always thought this’d happen one day,” Ryner admitted. His own expression was the halfway point between a smile and tears. “Suddenly. Because it’s always sudden…”

Sion didn’t answer.

“Hey, Sion.”

“……”

“You…”

“……”

“You want to kill me, don’t you?”

“…Yeah. I do,” Sion whispered. He sounded sad. Resigned.

But it was only natural. And Ryner was already so used to it. He was an Alpha Stigma bearing monster. He was a hateful being who existed only to hurt people. A species with no worth whatsoever. So he was used to being betrayed by the people who were precious to him.

He’d believed for a long, long time that it was better if he just disappeared from the world, before he could hurt anyone else. Before he could dig the wounds he’d already caused deeper. Wasn’t it better if he just died now than if he lived and prolonged everyone else’s suffering?

He’d believed that, too. But he continued to live idley anyway. And now he’d gone and hurt another person who he held dear.

Ryner looked at Sion, who was crying and pressing a hand to his chest hard, as if to fill a hole. He looked incredibly hurt. Like he was truly suffering.

The same voice as always echoed in Ryner’s head.

“What kind of impossible dreams do you ugly monsters have?”

Ryner felt like he was about to start crying, too.

“You should already know. Monsters’ hands are already covered in blood. They can’t grasp anything… and they can’t make it anywhere.”

He was going to cry.

“Your mere existence is a blight on this world. Monster.”

He knew that better than anyone.

Even so… he dreamed. He dreamed of something impossible.

But Ferris… Ferris said that he was still needed, even though he was the way he was.

And Sion… Sion said to come with him. That he was still needed.

So he ended up dreaming. It was a stupid dream. He dreamed of those days where they laughed, cried, yelled, and cried again to continue forever. 

He dreamed his stupid dream. And this was the result.

“This,” Ryner said softly in his voice that’d given up on anything and everything.

He hadn’t realized that Sion wanted to kill him. Not at all.

But… it was okay. For a brief second, he considered things.

Dying here wouldn’t be too bad if Sion was the one to kill him. He had a good run if he was able to die by the hand of someone who had once said that he needed Ryner.

Ryner took another step forward, presenting himself to the killing intent around him.

He felt something rise to his neck. As if to cut it. So he closed his eyes.

“……”

But when he did, there was an image waiting beneath his eyelids. It was that berserk dango girl, her face on the verge of tears despite her usual expressionlessness. 

“Idiot. I’d get lonely if you died…”

Ryner opened his eyes and grabbed whatever was approaching from his side.

“…Huh?” Ryner said. He surprised himself. He was ready to die, but his body moved on its own to grasp the arm of what had tried to hurt him, twist it, and snap it. Then he threw it at whatever was trying to get to him from the other side.

He felt someone behind him, too, so he dodged and then kicked. His foot slammed right into their head, knocking them away.

That was everyone.

He didn’t even need to see them. His body knew what to do based on their presence alone.

Ryner looked back in front of himself. Towards Sion, on the other side of the rain, the other side of the darkness.

“So like… umm, sorry, Sion. I don’t really want you to kill me.”

Sion didn’t answer.

“It’s like, umm, see… I just remembered, but if I died now, there’s this idiot that’d get lonely…”

“…You mean Ferris?”

“Yeah.”

“…Hm. It’s that ‘idiot… I’d get lonely if you died’ thing from earlier, right?”

“Well, um, it’s kind of embarrassing when you say it like that,” Ryner said and held his face in his hands for a second, then looked back at Sion. “But I’m not gonna run away anymore. Because I don’t want to hurt her.”

Sion smiled. “I see… But you know that I’d also be sad if I lost you, right?”

“Would you?”

“Yeah.”

“Then why do you want to kill me?”

“…I have to.”

“Can you explain the reason why you have to?” Ryner asked.

“I can’t.”

“That’s too horrible, isn’t it?”

Sion shrugged. “That’s how reality’s always been. Horrible.”

“Ah… well, that’s true,” Ryner said. He gathered his strength and crouched just so. He faced Sion—his buddy—and readied himself for a fight. “I won’t let you kill me. I already decided who gets to kill me.”

Yeah. He promised. So he couldn’t run away again, even if he hurt someone. He could run from the monster inside himself. And if he happened to lose to that monster someday… he already asked Ferris to kill him if it came to that.

“…If you come back.”

That’s how she responded. She promised, even though she gained nothing from it. Even though it’d only cause her pain.

“…I can’t let you kill me,” Ryner said to Sion.

“Another promise with Ferris?” Sion asked, troubled.

“Yeah.”

“You know… I’ll get jealous if Ferris is the only one you ever make promises with,” Sion said.

“You’re being gross again.”

“Haha… I guess there’s nothing I can do about it. I’m the one who breaks our promises first anyway.”

“…I still think of you as my buddy,” Ryner said.

Sion’s face warped like he was going to laugh and cry. “Me too.”

“But you’re still going to kill me?”

“Yeah,” Sion said.

“You already made up your mind?” Ryner asked. 

“Yeah.”

“Then… then it can’t be helped.”

Sion nodded. He looked stupidly sad. “Yeah. There’s nothing we can do about it now.” His hand fell to his waist, where he pulled a knife from his pocket. “Let’s end this, Ryner.”

Let’s end it, he said.

It was over.

The end was always such a sudden thing.

Even if he yelled for it to stop, it wouldn’t. And it was always like that. The more precious he thought something was, the stronger he felt, the faster it left him. They fell from his hands the moment he gave up.

He lost something when he gave up. Always lost something.

It was an endless cycle. One that he thought he was incapable of changing until recently.

He was a monster. There was absolutely no value in him continuing to live. He caused people to cry. That girl cried. Bio cried. Kiefer cried. Tony cried. Tyle cried. Fahle cried. Lafra cried. Pueka cried. He even made Ferris cry.

There was nothing he could do to stop it. 

No matter how much he screamed that he wanted the people he loved to stay with him, they always disappeared. Because the end always came too soon.

He was a monster. A human whose life was utterly worthless.

That was why he decided to stop wanting things. To just give up before he started, while he was still ahead.

But it was ending again now. Sion said so while crying.

It was happening again. He was making someone important to him cry and want him gone.

The end, the end, the end. It was the end. Everything always ended so easily. Everything slipped from his hands so easily.

He gave up and lost something. He gave up and lost. Over and over again.

The Ryner from before would have said that this was just how things were and gave up. But the Ryner now smiled. “Sorry, Sion, but this isn’t the end. You can’t beat me.”

“I will.”

Ryner shook his head. “No, you can’t. My full power’s actually a lot, you know? So after I beat you up real good, I’m gonna have you tell your best buddy Lord Ryner what’s got you so worried.”

“……”

“And then I’ll get Ferris here and we’ll laugh about how super lame all your problems are.”

Yeah. He’d decided. He’d changed. From now on, he wouldn’t lose anything important anymore. He’d try harder, little by little.

When he met Ferris.

“……”

No, when he met Sion. That was when he first thought it.

So now he said it to Sion instead of the other way around. “I won’t give up.”

“……”

“No matter how hard you worry about things by yourself… No matter how much you say that there’s nothing you can do about it… Even if you fall to a dark place where I can’t reach…”

“……”   

“I won’t… give up on you,” Ryner said as he faced Sion.

Sion didn’t answer. But that was fine.

Ryner raised his hand towards him.

Ryner thought of the words that Sion said to him, for him, so long ago. He raised his hand towards Sion and said them back. “Come with me, Sion.”

“……”

Sion’s expression didn’t waver. It was already too far gone to get any worse now. It was impossible for him to look any more pained.

And then, softly, Sion spoke. “No… You’re going to die here.”

“I won’t die.”

“You will.”

“I won’t die. I won’t die until I find a way to save you from whatever’s making you cry,” Ryner said.

“……”

Sion was silent. He looked up at the heavens as if asking for guidance and allowed the rain to hit his face like a wave of fresh tears. Then he sighed.

“……”

Then he looked back to Ryner. He wasn’t crying anymore. Instead, he smiled and gazed at Ryner like he was something dear. “I’m sure of it,” Sion said. “I’m certain of it now. My decision is the right one.”

“Like I said, you gotta explain the decision fir—”

Sion readied his knife. “I’ll save you, even if it means the world will…” 

“Huh? What are talking ab—”

“It’s the end, Ryner.”

“No, like I said, you need to explain—”

Sion crouched, then sprung forward, knife in hand.

“Augh, shit,” Ryner said and took a defensive pose. It’d been several years since they met now. But he’d never seriously fought Sion before.

“……”

Sion moved faster than Ryner thought he would.

“…You really think that can kill me?” Ryner asked.

“I don’t,” Sion said.    

“Then…”

Ryner’s words trailed off. Because he sensed a vague presence behind himself - the presence of one of the guys he thought he already knocked out. It rose up to attack Ryner with an impressive murderous intent.

“Whoa!?”

Ryner dodged then turned around, intent on taking that enemy down a second time.

“…Huh?”

Nobody was there. He’d turned because he felt a strong murderous intent. But nobody was there. The guy he thought it was, an assassin in all black, was actually lying on the ground a little ways away, still out.

But there was nobody next to him, where he thought he’d been attacked. Only a strong killing intent.

“The hell…?”

Ryner was surrounded by murderous intent. But nobody was there. The empty sky closing in seemed to be what wanted him dead, but… 

“…Ah.”

Ryner suddenly realized something. Little by little, the assassin on the ground before him was getting smaller. No, to be more precise… he was melting into the ground, with a strange, slippery noise as his body turned to liquid.

“Sion, did you…”

Watching it made Ryner realize.

“Did you…”

A human who melted into a liquid. Ryner knew what it was.

It was something from the old Roland. From their mad experiments. Human experiments.

This one was one of the worst experiments, too. It was one that worked in theory, but they’d never gotten to work in reality. If they tried it on one hundred subjects, all one hundred died. And it was performed on children still in the womb.

Obviously Sion made it an illegal experiment when he became king. He outlawed most human experiments then, as well as other dehumanizing practices: solitary confinement, corruption, and the use of malicious curses on humans. Now they were things of the past.

So why were they here, then?

“…Sion, don’t tell me you…”

He shouldn’t have. No, he wouldn’t have. Sion wouldn’t do that.

But he said it so easily. “Yeah. I perfected the experiment,” Sion said, his knife still bared.

“What!?”

“I really did.”

“Why!?” Ryner yelled.

“…Can you really afford to look away from it for that long?” Sion asked. 

Killing intent exploded under Ryner as that nothingness in liquid form sprung up, forming an arm to attack him with.

“Shit!” Ryner said, jumping back to dodge. But that just moved him closer to a different assassin. A different… victim. Of human experimentation. This one didn’t look human from the start. He looked like a monster with four arms sprouting from under his dark assassin’s garb. He moved to attack Ryner with those arms… but Ryner dodged, then moved to grab an attacking hand in his to stop it from trying again.

But when he touched it, he heard a sharp sound like something catching fire, and pulled his hand away. Because it hurt.

This assassin’s arms were hot like fire. And as soon as Ryner pulled away, the arms were swinging right back at him.

“Shit,” Ryner muttered as he raised his arm, this time to twist and break the assassin’s neck.

But… 

“Augh, shit!” He couldn’t. He couldn’t kill him.

The assassin put his burning hot arms on Ryner’s shoulders.

“Guah!” Ryner cried.

“…You shouldn’t sympathize with your enemies,” Sion said from behind. He held his knife up to drive into Ryner’s neck… 

But Ryner caught it in his left hand.

That didn’t stop Sion. He pushed Ryner down to the ground, then tried to push the knife in with all his force from on top of Ryner.

Ryner raised his legs to try to push Sion off, but they were soon grabbed and held down by the assassin who was a liquid human experiment victim.

“Shit,” Ryner groaned.

Another assassin stood behind Sion and began to draw a magic circle. It was a spell that Ryner had never actually seen used in practice before. Because it was illegal for countless reasons. Because its effect was too major. Because no spell could effectively disable it. Because it wounded the caster horribly.

And if he was going to use that spell here and now…

“This is bad,” Ryner groaned. He closed his eyes, then opened them again. A scarlet magic circle shone on top of his black eyes, proof of his Alpha Stigma, the mark of his monstrosity.

They were eyes that could see through all spells, whether they were illegal or not.

He looked at the assassin casting magic and saw everything: the spell’s effect, the reaction it caused, how to cast it, how long it’d take, and even how to cancel it.

“……”

It really was the world’s worst spell.

It was extremely difficult to counteract, and one use of it would destroy the caster’s body. His skin would crumble, his organs melt. He’d never be the same.

No normal person would cast it so easily. But here this assassin was, casting it like it was the most normal thing in the world. No… there was no way he decided to do it. Because if he had, he would have used a different spell.

Ryner used his Alpha Stigma to peer inside of him, searching for the magic circles that were carved into him as part of his human experimentation. He wasn’t surprised at what he found. It was one he recognized - the magic circle given to victims of corruption experiments.

It was an experiment that aimed to end people’s sense of pain and have them continue to fight even if their bodies were falling apart. It was an experiment to create a perfectly corrupt fighting machine. Its victims didn’t even mind using highly illegal and dangerous spells… 

“I won’t let you,” Ryner said. He began to draw the counterspell for it - something that’d stop it before it ever fired - with his free hand.

But just then, something burnt his arm.

“Oaugh!”

Burning hot arms held him down.

Then the forbidden spell finished. “Your Majesty, please get away. The spell is ready…”

Sion shook his head. “No. It’s fine. Cancel the spell.”

“B, but Your Majesty—”

“Don’t worry. I’ll kill Ryner myself.”

“…Understood.” He ended the spell. Even though the assassin’s body was corrupting more and more by the day due to the experiments done on him, he still sounded completely devoted to Sion. And it didn’t sound like brainwashing or anything. It sounded wholly sincere.

“…What have you been doing in this country?” Ryner asked.

Sion was now expressionless, a stark contrast to how he’d looked before. “Nothing in particular. I’ve done what’s natural. I have done and will continue to do what’s necessary.”

“So human experimentation is necessary now?”

“……”

“You’re killing me because it’s necessary?”

“…I don’t want to talk to yo—”

“Just answer me!” Ryner said. “What are you doing? What kind of responsibility is crushing you? Is it something I can save you from?”

“……”

“Remember what you said to me a year ago? You asked why I didn’t talk to you if things were so hard. You asked why I didn’t tell you. But that’s my line. Why can’t you just talk to me?” Ryner asked. “Why do you have to bear everything alone? I’ll turn your lame speech back on you. Am I so far removed from you that you don’t think you can talk to me!? Weren’t we supposed to be buddies!? Answer me, Sion Astal!”  

Sion’s expression didn’t even waver. It was completely blank. Like he wasn’t even seeing Ryner now. “It’s over, Ryner.”

“It’s not. Answer m—”

“It’s the end. I’m going to kill you,” Sion said and raised his heavy, knife-baring left arm, to Ryner’s neck.

“You won’t kill me!” Ryner yelled.

But it didn’t reach Sion. 

“You aren’t capable of killing your friends!”

His voice didn’t reach Sion. He didn’t react in the slightest. It was like his mind was in some far-off place, hidden in the dark of his mind. A darkness that Ryner didn’t know.

The rain. The dark. Roland. Human experiments. The crying Sion. The emotionless Sion. The hero king. The absolutely flawless… and absolutely alone king. The completely changed king.

“Where… where are you now?” Ryner asked.

Sion didn’t answer. He just pushed the knife closer. He was serious. He seriously meant to kill Ryner.

“…I’m going to bring you back,” Ryner said with a glare. “I’ll bring you back, no matter where you are.” And for that… “I’ll need to get a little serious.”

Ryner’s eyes narrowed. He focused his power into his left arm. He used it to break two of Sion’s left fingers to loosen his hold on the knight.

“Uuagh,” Sion groaned, his expression finally wavering.

Ryner didn’t leave it at that. His right arm was being held down by the flame man’s arms, but his fingers weren’t. He used his fingertips to draw a tiny magic circle. “I wish for thunder - Lightning Flash!”

A tiny bolt of lightning was born at his fingertips. It was incomparably weaker than a normal Lightning Flash. It definitely wasn’t capable of killing anyone. He couldn’t lift his arm to fire it at anyone, but he could point his fingers down and fire it at the ground.

The wet, rain-covered ground, that is.

Ryner shot the lightning. It crawled over the soaked pavement to shock the flaming man, the liquid man, as well as Ryner himself. It wasn’t enough to deal damage. It was really just enough to make them jump. But that was fine.

The hold they had on his arm and legs instantly weakened. Ryner took the opportunity to snag Sion’s knife and plunge it into the burning hot man’s leg.

“Gyaaah!”

Ryner ignored him, instead focusing on drawing a bigger Lightning Flash now that his arms were free. He aimed for the liquid man. But he was sure to go easy on him. Because he didn’t want to kill him.

Then he turned his attention to the corruption victim behind Sion. As long as there weren’t hoards more enemies hidden behind him, this should be an easy win.

Then he’d knock Sion unconscious, carry him to Ferris’ house, and force him to tell them what was going on, and then they’d figure out what to do about it.

He could do it. They’d save Sion… 

“……”

Sion looked at his magic circle with empty eyes and a faraway expression. Then he lifted his hand up to interfere with Ryner’s spell.

“You’re way too late. It’s already ready,” Ryner said. “I wish for thunder - Lightning Flash!”

Lightning gathered in the center of his magic circle. Unless something happened to the internal structure of the spell, it was past the point of no return now. But Sion still lifted his hand with his two broken fingers and waved in a small fanning motion, as if to call something.

Countless objects formed around Ryner’s magic circle. Swords. Black swords. Dark smoke was coming out of them, and their shapes wavered against reality.

He… remembered that smoke. It was a sight buried deep inside his memories.

He’d seen it somewhere before.

That smoke was the color of blood. Dusky, dull blood.

He’d seen it on armor. Armor made of blood, from his dream inside a dream.

It was the armor that man wore as he cried and swung his sword with endless determination. 

At first it was a goddess. An unbelievably, dazzlingly beautiful goddess. He swung his sword and killed her. And not just her. He swung his sword down on another goddess.

One, two, three, four died by his sword.

Ryner shivered. “Wh, what’s going on…”

The memory in his head continued despite everything.

He killed goddess after goddess as tears overflowed from his eyes. And he smiled.

Somehow, he was familiar to Ryner.

Five, six, seven, eight goddesses died by his sword. The landscape was painted with blood. The world was painted with blood - the blood of all goddesses, the blood of all the world.

Everything in the world ended. Everything in the world would end.

He knew the man who killed the world. Ryner knew the man who wore armor of blood.

Ryner slowly looked up at Sion.

“You’re…”

Sion’s blood-made swords pierced the light, and the magic circle that Ryner had drawn disappeared from the world.

“…This can’t be…”

Ryner was in shock. Because his magic circle had completely disappeared even though he already made it. No, it was like he never made it in the first place. He suddenly couldn’t even remember what spell it was supposed to be. It was like a hole had been carved in his mind to cut his memory of it out entirely and killed it.

Sion looked down at him. But it wasn’t the Sion that Ryner knew. 

He looked like Sion, but at the same time, he didn’t even look human. His skin was shining from liquid gold in his veins. From despair in his veins.

Strange curses, hexes, and spells flowed through him that Ryner couldn’t comprehend even with the Alpha Stigma. What flowed inside of Sion was the world’s everything.

His curse spread across the world. It was darkness, no, something deeper than even that. It covered the world like a plague.

The sky disappeared. The city disappeared. The world disappeared, as if it had been moved to somewhere else entirely.

Sion stared straight into Ryner with his golden eyes and spoke. But his voice wasn’t that of a human’s. “Ah, aah, Ryner, aah, aaahh, so this is where you were… My, my beloved… My sad… Lonesome Demon… My swords were able to materialize thanks to you…”

Those words didn’t come from Sion’s mouth. Instead… it was a voice that resonated from the world itself.

“Y-you’re—”

“Is it time? It’s time. It’s time. Let’s start, yes, let’s start. I will devour you and become Truth. Solver of All Riddles… Aaaahh, so you were here, aaaahhh… Then. Then I’ll devour you.”

“Wh, what’re you—”

Sion… no, he interrupted Ryner. His palm, filled with despair, drew close to Ryner’s neck.

“……”

Ryner lost his words. He couldn’t say a thing.

He continued, his face empty. “Eternity. An eternity of wandering in hell. I’ll take you there. I’ll take you, I’ll take you, I’ll take you, ah, aah, aaaahhh… I’ll devour you. The world is waiting. I’ll devour you. The world is…”

An arm suddenly reached up from Ryner’s chest. It was a thin, pale arm with a woman’s hand. Ryner recognized it. It was the same arm as in his dream - the arm of the woman who said she loved him as she cried.

Her arm came from the black letter that’d been left on his chest after that day, and twisted around Sion’s torso.

“It’s not… it’s not time for that just yet, now is it?” She asked. Her voice came from inside of Ryner’s chest. “Stop what you’re doing.”

Ryner didn’t know who she was, but her voice was so nostalgic that he wanted to cry even now.

“……”

But he didn’t. He didn’t do anything. He couldn’t speak, even though he wanted to scream. He wanted to scream the woman’s name. He wanted to scream Sion’s name. But he couldn’t. All he could do was collapse, unable to move.

Sion tilted his head. “Who are you? Alpha? No, you’re not Alpha. You’re just in the way. I will become Truth. I will devour him. I will devour the Solver of All Formulas… 

“Give it up,” the woman said. “It isn’t time. You should know that too. Get out here, Omega, Weaver of All Formulas…”

At her call, someone appeared behind Sion, as if he’d been there the whole time. He had blond hair and an eerily beautiful face that so resembled Ferris’. 

Lucile Eris.

Lucile smiled. “My, to think that you’d have come all this way… I seem to have been looking down on you a bit too much, Duchess _____.” 

For some reason, Ryner couldn’t hear the end. But that was the least of his worries now.

More importantly, what the hell just happened?

Why was Lucile here? Omega? Weaver of All Formulas? Were they talking about Lucile? But what did that mean…?

“Stop him at once and free Ryner,” the woman said.

Lucile shrugged. “He wants to eat him…”  

“But it isn’t time yet.”

“Yeah. True. That’s true,” Lucile said. “But if we let this opportunity pass, you people will just get in the way again. So it’s alright if everything ends now…”

 “It’s impossible. It’s not that easy. The world won’t change by the hand of your little game… If the world were that simple, no one would be hurt. I wouldn’t be, you wouldn’t be, and the girl you hold so dear wouldn’t be… You know that better than anyone, don’t you? Lucile.”

Lucile’s expressionless, emotionless face reacted ever so slightly to her words. “Yes… you’re right. It’s as you say.”

“Then stop him.”

“Understood. I’ll stop him.”

“…I’m glad. I’m glad that a little of your true self still remains.”

Lucile looked to Ryner’s chest. “My true self? Ha, haha, hahaha. My true self… my true self, huh. I could say the same of you. No, that’s what I really want from you people, you know?”

“……”

The woman didn’t answer. So Lucile continued.

“But Sion is different. He’s different from you. I am certain that he won’t lose himself. I am certain that he won’t lose sight of what’s important to him. That’s why I chose him. Because he will always choose the correct path, no matter how hard it is, no matter how much he cries, and no matter how much it threatens to tear him apart… So I won’t do what you want me to…”

“Shut up,” the woman said.   

Lucile peered down at Ryner’s face and continued. “Yes. Sion will betray you. He will betray you. Are you listening? Are you listening to me, Ryner Lute, you ugly beast, you miserable demon…”

“Shut up!” The woman yelled.

Lucile continued. “Sion will betray you… and when he does, you’ll sink into a sea of despair far deeper and far darker than death for all eternity…”

“I told you to shut up!”

Lucile shrugged. Laughed. Like he was ridiculing them. Pitying them. He raised a hand to Ryner’s face. “But, well, it’s fine. Continue with your make-believe friendship, brandishing your justice and your love, without ever understanding his pain. You can sleep peacefully, just like you always do…”

Lucile’s hand covered Ryner’s eyes.

The world suddenly got further away.

The blood-colored dye was wiped from the world and the scenery changed to empty white as his consciousness was torn from him. But in exchange, he got his voice back.

Everything was turning white, and his mind was becoming hazier with every passing moment.

But with his voice back, Ryner managed a single word, in the end— 

“…Sion.”

He called his buddy’s name.

---

“…Hey. Hey, wake up.”

He was being told to wake up. But from what? 

“You’re half asleep. C’mon, wake up already.”

He couldn’t open his eyes even if that voice asked. They were just so heavy. And he was so sleepy.

“Come on, get up.”

“…Mm.”

“You’ll catch a cold if you sleep here. Ugh, geez, get up already, you idiot.”

“Mm… magh…”

He opened his eyes. Well, he tried to. But it was so, so bright, so he instantly closed them again and wrinkled his nose. His head was throbbing. There was no way he was going to open his eyes to that light.

“I’m tired,” he said.

“I’m tired too!!” The voice shouted. “Come on, just get up.”

He reluctantly opened his eyes a sliver. His head was throbbing. He was so, so tired. But he did his best to open his eyes for the feeble eyes that kept asking him to.

He opened his eyes bit by bit until he recognized the room he was in. It was the same room as always. The same simple room with a bookcase and two desks.

“…Huh? Wait, why am I here…?”

“Are you still half asleep?” The voice asked. Now that he was awake, he realized that it belonged to someone he knew well. Black hair and black eyes. A lanky guy who was a little taller than he was. It was his friend. His buddy. He was terribly lethargic, and tired to the point of exhaustion. “What’re you trying to do, asking me to help with work and then falling asleep before me like that?”

“Huh… um, what’re you doing here, Ryner? I mean… shouldn’t you be—”

Ryner scowled and tapped Sion’s head a few times. “Hellooo? You still half-asleep?”

He gazed at Ryner’s face for a long moment. “Huh? Um, half-asleep?”

Then his situation fell into place into his mind.

Right. He had fallen asleep in the middle of working.

He had a lot to work on, so he dragged Ryner into it to make it less boring. They were on their fifth day without sleeping. And then, just when it seemed like they were about to finish… 

“…I was really asleep?”

“Like a baby.”

 “For how long?”

“For hours,” Ryner said.

“No way.”

“Seriously.”

“You’re seriously serious?”

“Man, you’re annoying,” Ryner said.

It was only then that Sion really felt like he woke up. His surroundings finally felt real.

But then. That meant.

“…It was all a dream.”

“Hm? A dream?” Ryner asked.

He nodded. “It was… it was like…”

“Hm.”

“It was…”

He meant to explain his dream to Ryner, but when he tried to gather his words to describe it, he realized that he didn’t really remember.

“Huh? I forgot.”

“Come on, what’s with you?” Ryner asked.

“No, really… I don’t remember. It was just…”

“Umm, hey. Sion.”

“Hm?”

“I’d feel gross listening to another man’s dream, you know.”

He couldn’t help but laugh. “Ah… yeah. Right. You’re right.”

“Yeah.”

“Sorry.”

“Not something you gotta apologize for,” Ryner said. “So?”

“Huh? So what?”

Ryner shrugged. “The dream. Was it good? Or bad?”

He tried to remember it again. He couldn’t recall the contents, really. But he did know the answer to Ryner’s question. “I feel like it was a really bad dream.”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah.”

“Then it’s a good thing I woke you up.”

He ended up smiling again. “Yeah. Thank you. You saved me.”

Ryner grinned in a mean-spirited way. “No, like… You were laughing all weird in your sleep and saying stuff like ‘yes, I’m surrounded by old ladies’ bras! This is a dream come true!’ and I didn’t know if waking you up was the right thing to do or not, you know~?”

“I really said that?”

“You sure did.”

“Oh, damn. You figured my fetish out.”

“It’s no fun if you don’t even deny it,” Ryner said.

“Ahaha.” He looked at the clock. It was six in the morning, so if Ryner was to be believed, he’d been asleep since two in the morning.

The deadline for his work today was nine. So he only had three hours.

“Alright, back to work.”

Ryner made a bored face and patted the stack of papers on his desk. “It’s all done. Head on over to your bed in the next room over and get some sleep.”

“Huh?” He looked up at Ryner’s face, then down to the stack of papers on his desk. The documents were taken care of, and the proposal was perfect. He looked back up at Ryner, who looked the same as always: tired, and a little apathetic. “Umm, did you do all this yourself?”

“Yep.”

“Why?”

“We didn’t have much time until the deadline, so I pretty much had to.”

“N, no, I mean… You could have woken me up—”

“Uuuughh, you’re such a paaaiin,” Ryner said. He’d averted his eyes. “I tried to get you up, but it didn’t work.”

That was a lie. The kind of obvious lie that anyone would figure out in seconds.

So he smiled again. So he felt like he was going to cry. So he felt happy.

It was such a small, stupid, insignifigant thing. It was amazing that it could make him feel like this. Despite his bad dream, his suffering and his despair, all it took was something this small… 

It made everything go back to how it should be.

“Thank you,” he said.

Ryner scowled even harder.

So he laughed. “Thank you, Ryner.”

“Ughh, geez! Cut it out already! Go to bed!”

“I slept four hours, so let’s get back to work together.”

“I never got to sleeeeppp!!” Ryner cried.

It was the same situation as always with the same resolution as always.

So he laughed and laughed, to the point where tears would soon begin to prick at the corners of his eyes.

“……”

But then he realized that this was wrong.

This scene. This sight. It was already a thing of the past.

This was the dream he always had. He felt like he’d cry every time from his sadness. Every time his heart seemed to break in two. Because all of this had already ended. Even though he’d once thought that it’d continue for eternity, now it was gone and he’d never get it back.  

Eternity didn’t really exist, after all.

It didn’t matter how much he screamed and cried for a little longer. Eternity would never fall into his hands.

Time moved on. The gears moved the world forward. The weight on his shoulders never left.

It was time. He had to wake up. The world was waiting. Reality was waiting. He had to open his eyes and wake up from this dream. He knew that. He knew it. But Ryner… 

---

“…My heart feels like it’ll break in two,” Sion Astal said as he opened his eyes a second time.

He was crouched in the rain. It only ever seemed to get heavier.

He felt like he was crying. But maybe his tears had already dried up. He couldn’t tell what was the rain or his tears anymore… 

Sion closed his eyes to stop his pointless tears. To stop the pointless rain.

The scene on the other side of his eyelids was no longer his warm dream. He couldn’t return to those times. He had to move forward. He had to make his choice and move forward.

“…I have to move forward.”

Sion opened his eyes and cast his golden eyes downwards.

Ryner was there, unconscious. His hair was soaking wet, as were his clothes. If he stayed here… 

“…You’ll catch a cold,” Sion murmured. He took a second knife from his waist, and stared at his reflection on the blade as it was pelted by raindrops. His expression was empty.

“……”

But human. He still looked like a human being. He hadn’t been completely devoured yet. So if he did something now, it was by his own judgement. It would be his decision and no one else’s.

“……”

Sion gripped the knife hard, then lowered it gently, as gently as he could to Ryner’s neck.

All he had to do was push it in now. It wouldn’t take much strength at all, and then it’d be the end.

It’d be the end of his suffering.

And… Ryner would be saved.

“……”

Because… he couldn’t go on like this. If he continued to live, Ryner would be sacrificed to the monster and never die. He’d suffer in darkness, in agony, until the end of neverending time.

Sion had to kill him. He had to kill him here and now.

“…Kill him,” Sion told himself. He gripped the knife harder. “Kill him.”

He didn’t care what happened to the world. He didn’t care what happened to anyone or anything else.

If it would save his friend… if it would save his buddy— 

“…I’ll kill him.” 

His hand was shivering.

Just a little more. He only had to push his shivering hand a little closer. It’d end everything.

“……”

He looked at Ryner’s face and the memories he didn’t need to remember swirled in his mind. Even though it was raining, even though he was crying, he couldn’t stop thinking about their memories together.

When they first met, the first time he saw Ryner smile.

Countless unnecessary memories swirled around in his mind.

His lethargic face. His sleepy face. His unmotivated face. His annoying face.

Ryner had said something with that annoying face. He said, ‘it wasn’t a pipe dream after all.’

He said, ‘you’ve done enough already.’ Even though he didn’t actually know anything.

What was Sion doing? This was a terrible betrayal, and Ryner hadn’t suspected it at all. Because he didn’t know anything. But he still said that he wouldn’t give up on Sion. He said that they’d go together, and that he’d pull Sion out from the darkness.

He always made that face like everything was a pain. He always made that sleepy face. He always made that annoying face. But in the end, he had the nerve to smile.

So… So that was why Sion… 

“I’ll save…”

It was raining. He pressed the knife to Ryner’s throat.

“I’ll save you… from the darkness…”

But… he couldn’t cut the knife through Ryner’s life.

Sion gazed into Ryner’s sleeping face. His buddy’s face. He lost conciousness with such a stupid expression.

Sion smiled sadly and pulled the knife away, then dropped it onto the pavement where it made an audible clink against the hard ground. But Ryner didn’t open his eyes. He just slept with that stupid happy expression on his face. It was a stupid, relaxed, anxiety-free expression.

He’d been the same when they first met. Even then, he was constantly sleepy and never had the motivation for anything.

Sion smiled sadly, endeared. Then he stood. “Ah, shit… It’s your win. I can’t kill him.”

A voice answered from inside his mind. “Nobody won… I’m you, after all.”

“…Haha,” Sion laughed at himself. But it sounded an awful lot like a sob. “Right. I’m you.”

“I’m… we’re… incredibly weak…” 

“Yeah. But we still move forward.”

“Do we still betray our friend?”

“……”

“Do we offer our friend up as sacrifice and betray him?”

“……”

“Do we sacrifice our friend and move forward to hell?”

“…Yeah.”

“I can’t bear that.”

“Yeah.”

“And yet… I can’t bear killing Ryner, either… I’m a weakling who can’t save him.”

“You did your best.”

“…Don’t kid yourself.”

“Don’t blame yourself.”

“…Don’t kid yourself.”

“Your choice wasn’t wr—”

“Don’t kid yourself! What do you understand!? What do you really understand!?” Sion yelled to the rain.

His heart was going to break. It’d really break at this rate. The despair would squeeze it open and the darkness would suck it up.

It was useless. Useless.

“…I just want to disappear,” Sion said.

“I see,” the voice said. He sounded sad.

“…Devour me. Let me disappear. I hand my heart… to you.”

“Okay. I understand. It’ll be okay. You won’t have to worry about anything anymore. I’ll… I’ll deal with the rest.”

“…Sorry.”

“It’s fine. Just disappear.”

Sion nodded and closed his eyes.

“……”

“……”

“……”

“……”

Sion opened his eyes. He’d eaten his way out of their heart through his sadness.

Outside was the neverending sound of rain and the sight of dark.

He looked down.

There lay his ally. His friend. His buddy. The sacrifice. Despair.

Sion pressed a hand to his aching chest at the sight of despair. The darkness was squeezing his heart. He wanted to cry. He felt like he’d throw up. He wanted to scream.

Save him, save him, save him.

Someone, please. Release him from this pain and sadness.

He wanted to scream that to whoever would listen.

But even so… 

“…I’m going to move forward,” he said to his other self, who’d already disappeared. His other self who dreamed his naive and sad dream. “It’s okay. I’m okay. I’m going to move forward…”

He took a step into the torrential rain and darkness. Then he stopped for a second and looked back.

“…We won’t… we won’t meet again, but… I’m glad that your face is the last thing I saw, Ryner,” he whispered.

Ryner didn’t open his eyes. He just lay there, pelted by rain, a content expression on his sleeping face.

Sion smiled. He couldn’t help but feel happy at the sight.

“…See you.”

He didn’t look back a second time. If he did, his heart would waver.

“……”

So he didn’t.

---

And so he repainted the world.

---

Table of Contents

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Chapter 9: The Final Day

Table of Contents

Previous | Next

---

Roland was sunny again today. It was the kind of weather where the sun stretched on forever, unhindered by clouds as far as the eye could see.

This time of year was always like that. It was a sunny season that only rarely got rain. The rainy season would begin about a month from now, but for the time being, rain was rare.

It was a comfortable temperature, too - not too hot and not too cold.

“……”

The office was the same as always, too.

Ryner yawned. His desk was covered in papers that Sion had forced on him. He turned his neck to look around at the room he’d already looked across countless times by now. Then he leaned back in his chair and sighed softly. His sleepy eyes stared a little blankly at the center of the room.

It was a simple room with nothing but bookshelves and desks, as well as massive piles of paperwork on top of the desks, and Sion, whose tombstone would list ‘paperwork’ as his cause of death.

Also, there was a sheet in the corner with a tea set and dango boxes that Ferris had dubbed the dango party area. She was currently sitting up and sleeping soundly, with her arms curled around her knees.

Everything about the room was normal by now. He felt like he saw it every single day now. The only change was the season outside.

Ryner looked out the window. “Hey, Sion.”

Sion looked up from his work, but his hands didn’t stop moving. “Hm?”

“I like, just realized something.”

“Mhm?”

“When I came back to this country.”

“Yeah.”

“…It’s the same season now as it was then.”

Sion raised his head, surprised, and looked out the window just like Ryner was doing. “Wow. It’s been that long?”

“Looks like it.”

“A whole year?”

“Yeah,” Ryner said and nodded.

A year. A whole year. A year’s worth of months had passed since he came back to Roland. He tried to look back over that time, but when he did, all he really remembered was Sion forcing him to work and work and pull ten all nighters in a row, bringing him to the brink of death. Ferris was always here throwing her sword around and holding it against his neck like it was some kind of game, too. 

He was also forced to crossdress as part of a trap Sion set for the nobility at one point, and at another point Ferris humiliated him at a high class restaurant for fun, and then another time Sion used a spell to force him to work himself to death, and then another time he got wrapped up in interviews for Ferris’ hand in marriage and nearly beheaded, and then there was that love letter for Sion that nearly caused his death too, and the time he went to the hot springs with Ferris and almost got murdered… 

“……”

Why was it that when he thought back on the past year, all he could remember were times he almost died?

Ryner glared at Sion and Ferris with his usual sleepy eyes. “It was… a whole year of me begging for forgiveness from you cruel demons…”

Sion laughed. “Heheh. We’ve really enriched your life, haven’t we?”

“I’m gonna kill you.”

“Say that all you want. I know you actually love pulling all nighters with me—”

“No I fucking dooooon’t!!” Ryner yelled.

“No need to get so worked up about it,” Sion said happily. “Say it honestly: ‘Every day has sparkled since coming to work under my lord Sion Astal. Thank you, thank you,  my lord! ♡’ It’s like that, right?”

“What? I’m seriously gonna kill you.”

Sion shrugged, pleased, and looked over to Ferris, who was still sleeping in the corner. “Ferris, wake up. Ryner just said he was going to kill you—”

“No, waaaiiit!!” Ryner yelled and stood up hurriedly, then lunged for Sion and covered his mouth with his hand. Then he looked over at Ferris, begging for her to not wake up from the bottom of his heart. But the demon slowly opened her eyes!

It’s over, Ryner thought. It was over. It’d end the same as always.

She’d say, ‘Ah, the sky’s so clear today. Alright, Ryner. I’ll let your head fly through this peaceful blue sky ♡’ or something equally as nonsensical and start swinging her sword around.

That had become a daily occurrence over the past year. 

“…Augh, I’m gonna die,” Ryner said, and raised his arms to protect his head. 

“…Mmgh?” Ferris mumbled, then yawned. “Aahh, mm… Hm? Ryner, what are you doing? Did you call for me?”

Ryner’s eyes opened wide. Sh, she didn’t hear! She slept right through Sion’s provocation! H, h, he was saved!

“…I heard my name,” Ferris mumbled.

Ryner shook his head with all his strength. “N, no, I didn’t call you! That definitely didn’t happen!”

“Mm? But I’m sure that someone did…”

“I-i-it was a dream, right? It has to have been a dream,” Ryner insisted.

Ferris tilted her head sleepily. “Mmh… a dream? Ah… yes, a dream… The Dango God called on me in my sleep for He wishes to create a dango kindergarten, and wants me to be the teacher… yes, that was it. Now, where are the kids?”

How the hell would he know! He wanted to make that kind of rebuttal, but he didn’t for the sake of his life.

In any case, she’d been sleeping deeper than expected and hadn’t heard Sion at all from the looks of it.

Ryner let out a sigh of relief. If she’d heard, his head could have very well been flying through the sky by now. But it looked like he was off the hook.

And then Sion pushed Ryner’s hand off of his mouth. “Actually, Ferris, Ryner—”

“Uwwwaaawwawawawh!?” Ryner said and pushed his hand back onto Sion’s mouth. In the same motion he pushed himself onto the desk, on top of Sion, to keep him from moving. 

Ferris looked up at them, in a pile on the desk, with a curious expression. “So what are you two doing?”

“N-n-nothing!” Ryner said, flustered. “R, right, Sion!?”

“…Fgh, fghfogh,” was all Sion could say through the hand on his mouth as he struggled under Ryner.

“See?” Ryner said. “Sion also says it’s nothing!”

“…Hm.”

“S, so I don’t really get it, but you said you’re gonna teach at a dango kindergarten? The kids are waiting for you, right?”

“Ah, right!”

“Riiight? So why don’t you go back to bed?”

“Mm. I’ll sleep.”

“Nigh…”

Ferris’ voice drifted off as her eyes closed. She fell asleep halfway through her sentence, her breathing slowing to leisurely sleep’s calm breaths. She was beautiful like that. Exceptionally so. Angelic, really. But the second she opened her eyes she proved herself to be a demon capable of destroying the world as he knew it. She was the most dangerous lifeform in existence.

Ryner looked back at Sion to glare at him. “Hey, you! Is there any limit to how shitty you are!?” He whispered.

Sion smiled mischievously and pushed Ryner’s hand off. “I’m proud of how shitty I am!”

“Fucking demon.”

Sion smiled, and then spoke in an eerily high tone. “Heheh. Demon… demon, you say… To me, those are words of high praise!”

“What kind of impression’s that supposed to be?”

“Huh? Isn’t that what villains are supposed to sound like?”

“That was easily the worst villain impression I ever heard.”

“Really?” Sion said, then shrugged. But the motion made him wince. “By the way, Ryner, you’re pinning me really hard. It kind of hurts…” 

“Ah, sorry,” Ryner said. He gripped Sion’s arms tighter.

“Wagh, th, that hurts! H-hey!”

Ryner grinned. “Oh, sorryy! I accidentally went for harder instead.”

“Don’t fuck with meee!” Sion yelled. It was rare to hear him raise his voice like that. “C, come on, Ryner, stop, seriously! You’ll break my wrists if you keep going!”

“Don’t feel like it,” Ryner said and gripped even harder.

“Uhh!” Sion’s scream turned silent. Then he spoke, tired. “Hey, Ryner… I’d really like it if you didn’t play so rough after so many all nighters—”

“I say that every single time!” Ryner said. “But what happens!? You just make me do it again and again and again…” Ryner put his long-standing grudge into his hands and used it to bully Sion, wringing his wrists.

“Augh, uwagh, sto, urgh, s, seriously, st—!” Sion’s voice cut off abruptly, and there was a snapping sound. He stopped moving.

“Huh? Hey, Sion?”

No response.

“…Umm, Sion?”

“Whaaat? I really wasn’t going pushing too hard… Um, uhh, don’t tell me you actually fainted from the pain…?”

Again, no response.

“Th, this could be bad,” Ryner said and weakened his hold.

But in that second, Sion opened his eyes and jumped up with a demon’s smile. “Idiot!” He said and flipped them so he was on top.

“Ugh, you really were just acting!” Ryner said. Sion’s left hand was coming for Ryner’s wrist, so Ryner tried to catch Sion’s wrist before his own was caught. But that just made Sion change course and go for Ryner’s neck. Ryner countered by entwining his fingers with Sion’s before they could touch the skin of his neck.

It was a hard-fought battle on Sion’s desk.

Sion tried to get back away from Ryner’s hand. Doing so made his foot connect with the chair. He took the chance to kick it up.

“A kick!?” Ryner said, shocked, and stopped the chair, then glared back at Sion. “Aww, c’mon. Don’t you think you’re overdoing it?”

“Overdoing it?” Sion repeated. “In a fight? There’s no such thing.”

“Huh, we were fighting?” Ryner said, surprised.

“Weren’t we?”

“Uhh… oh, so we were fighting…”

 “Um, yeah?”

“So that means anything goes?” Ryner asked.

“Yeah.”

“You really want that? You know that you can’t win if I go all out on you, right, Sion?”

Sion smiled. “You won’t know until you try.”

“Yeah, I do.”

“No, you don’t.”

Ryner grinned. “Then I’m gonna take out my grudge on you! Alright!” He threw a fist straight for Sion’s face.

Sion responded two beats too slowly. His reflexes were no match for Ryner’s when he got serious.

See? Ryner thought. This was why Sion shouldn’t be picking fights with him. He watched Sion’s face as Ryner’s fist approached and he failed to respond.

Sion really did look tired. But that was only natural. He went days and days without sleeping at a time, always working as hard as possible, even harder than Ryner who he forced to work with him. Because he thought he needed to do everything for this country by himself.

He hadn’t changed ever since they met, and he definitely hadn’t changed over the past year.

Sion had brought before unseen stability to Roland, calmed the nobility, settled things with Estabul, and was even keeping their neighboring country Imperial Nelpha at bay despite their suspicious military movements.

And yeah, maybe the world was entering an age of conflict due to the Gastark Empire’s southern-facing onslaught, but Roland was peaceful for the time being. For the past year, even.

There was no way he wasn’t tired with all that going on. He had to deal with enough problems to make anyone go insane, piling up around him, each potential solution just as uncertain as the last.

But he didn’t rest.

This was the Roland Empire, the large country making up the southern tip of the continent. But their king was worn-out to the core… 

“Aw, geez.”

Ryner opened his fist just before it connected with Sion’s face, and used the hand on his cheek to push Sion back down on the desk under him.

Sion smiled, tired but triumphant. “My, my, look how easy you got me.”

“I tooold you.”

“Yeah… You’re amazing alright. I couldn’t even see your fist. I should expect no less of Roland’s strongest magician.”

“You’re tired, aren’t you?”

“I think I look pretty energetic,” Sion said.

“Not at aaaall.”

“Really?”

“I mean, it doesn’t really matter, but… More importantly, umm… uh, why were we fighting again?”

Sion laughed. “Actually, we weren’t really fighting. You suddenly yelled ‘oh, I can’t bear it anymore!’ and pushed me down on my desk—”

“Heeey.”

“Jokes aside, then.”

“It wasn’t even a good joke.”

Sion smiled again. It was a tired smile.

“Just sleep already,” Ryner said. “You’ve been working way too heard.”

“Hm, you’re right. I guess my body’s reaching its limit again, isn’t it.”

“Riight?” 

“Yeah. I guess we ought to settle our match then.”

“Huh? You still wanna go? Isn’t it already settl—”

“Not yet,” Sion said and raised his right hand. It looked like he was planning on hitting Ryner in the face.

“Like that’ll work,” Ryner said. Sion was too slow, and that wasn’t even considering the fact that Ryner was presently on top of him; the situation was stacked against Sion no matter how he looked at it. Ryner moved his upper body to the side to avoid Sion’s fist.

It would work. Because this was just a pointless struggle on Sion’s behalf.

But then Sion laughed, his face the spitting image of a child pulling a prank. “It’s your loss, Ryner.”

Ryner finally noticed the inside of Sion’s fist. His sleepy eyes opened wider than usual. “Whaaaat!?” He tried to get off in a hurry.

“I won’t let you get away!” Sion said and pulled Ryner close by the shirt.

He couldn’t escape! “Y, you’re kidding m—”

Something terrible happened.

Sion raised his fist above Ryner’s head and turned it… pouring the open jar of ink he’d hidden inside on Ryner. It’d never get out of his clothes if it touched them, and he’d have to wash his face dozens of times to even hope to get it out…!

Obviously this wouldn’t be a problem in a real fight. Ink wouldn’t kill him. Not dodging wouldn’t put his life in danger.

Still.

“You fucking idioooot!!” Ryner shrieked, just as serious as he’d be if the ink were a deadly poison. The ink made contact with his head. It got on his hair. His face. Some even got in his eye, coloring his field of vision black. Of course his clothes got it all over them, too.

And then there was Sion, laughing loudly beneath him.

“……”

This was the worst. Sion was the worst.

Sion was laughing so hard that he was holding his stomach like it was painful. “Hah, aah, geez… I’m so tired that even laughing hurts… Umm, so it looks like I win our little fight… So let’s sleep,” Sion said, like that was the end of it. Like this was some kind of happy end. That’s what the fake nice boy tone he used made it sound like.

“……”

Ryner was silent. He stood from where he’d been lying on Sion on the desk, then stood somewhat straddling him.

“Uh? What’s wrong, Ryner?” Sion asked.

“……”

Ryner looked around carefully.

“Are you looking for something?”

“……”

Ryner ignored him again. But his eyes focused on one spot, because he’d found what he’d been looking for. He stared. Staaaared. “Hey, Sion.”

“Hm?”

“You just said you wanted to go to sleep soon, right?”

“Yeah.”

“But every time you say that and I go back to my place to sleep, you keep working, don’t you?”

Sion was quiet for a moment, guilty as charged. “No, um, just a little?”

“Would really call ten more hours after all the all-nighters ‘just a little?’”

“Augh,” Sion groaned. 

“You must reeaaaallly want all of your friends who just want you to rest for a little bit to worry about you, don’t you?”

“Huh? Um, were you that worried about me?” Sion asked.

Ryner nodded seriously. “Isn’t it obvious that I’d be? What guy doesn’t worry about his buddies?”

Yeah. It was natural that he’d worry about his precious friend. He was seriously worried. From the bottom of his heart. There was no helping it - he’d always worry and worry. So he looked at Sion earnestly.

“I worry about you,” Ryner said.

“…So, I’m really happy to hear that you’re always worried about me, but… see, my throat’s all dry from all that acting, and uh, it’s bothering me a lot…”

For some reason, Sion’s voice came out shaky.

“……”

Ryner was silent.

“A, and you haven’t been looking at me for a while… You’ve just been looking at the red ink in the corner, and uh, that’s been bothering me too…”

Ryner smiled. “Naaah. I wouldn’t pull a baby prank like you, stupid king.”

“R, right… right?” Sion said. His voice shook as he spoke.

“Of couurrse nooot!! I mean, I just get so worried about you. Ah, is my best buddy Sion sleeping right now? Is he resting up like he should be right now? I’m always thinking about it, worrying about you. You understand my feelings, right?”

“…Uuuuh…”  

“You understand, right?”

“Uuuuh…”

“And see, I just thought of something. I thought of the perfect way to make sure you sleep soundly,” Ryner said and picked the red ink off the desk.

“You’re actually doing it, aren’t you!?” Sion shrieked. He tried to escape from the desk, but Ryner put his foot down on Sion’s chest to hold him in place.

“You can’t escaaape!” Ryner said in a sing-song tone. “You’ll just work yourself to death if you do. So I’m taking matters into my own hands.” He opened the red ink.

“I, I know, Ryner!” Sion said. “I know I’m at fault, so please! Please calm d—”

“Go the fuck to sleeeeep!!” Ryner yelled and turned the red ink over.

“Noooo!” Sion yelled. “No, wait, don’t do this! These papers are important! I won’t let you ruin them!” Sion raised himself to the best of his ability to protect the paperwork with his body. He grabbed onto Ryner, pulling them closer, to contain the ink between them.

“Wait, no!” Ryner said. “Get away! You’re gonna get it on me too… augh, I’m gonna fall! We’re gonna fall!”

Instead of letting go, Sion just held on tighter.

““Uwaaawhahahgh!!””

They yelled in unison as they fell off the desk in a tangled mess, Ryner below Sion. Ryner had tried to correct his posture in midair to cushion the fall, but Sion got in the way and made it impossible. He couldn’t even protect his head well with Sion there.

“Ughhh, you’re so—!!”

Ryner’s voice cut off halfway through his sentence. Because he just realized something terrible. 

Just now, the door to hell opened in Sion’s cramped office.

“Aahh…”

That was all he could say. He was paralyzed from fear. Anyone would be here at the entrance to their eternal punishment. 

The hell he’d arrived at… was on top of Ferris’ head… 

“Kyah!?”

She made a cute noise unlike anything he’d ever heard from her.

Ryner and Sion stood up as fast as humanly possible.

Ferris was in the corner, crouched over the crushed dango set she’d so excitedly proclaimed she’d eat tomorrow morning.

“……”

“……”

Ryner and Sion exchanged a look, their mouths hanging open in a silent but mutual ‘oh shit.’

This was bad. Worse than bad.

The door to hell was hanging wide open.

Ferris slowly began to raise her head.

“Oh, um, oh, uhh, Ryner,” Sion stuttered. “Look what you’ve done with your roughhousing! Poor Ferris.”

“Y, you’re cold—”

“Um, see, Ferris, I tried to stop him,” Sion said. “But Ryner said he had to settle his grudge on me…”

“You bastard!” Ryner yelled.

But Sion ignored him, and continued in his annoying nice boy act. “But please don’t be mad at Ryner. He’s been working so hard helping me with my work lately. He’s tired and stressed from all nighters, so that’s why he got rowdy enough to bother you… I’ll scold him properly, so… let’s call it a day, alright? I’m going to take a bath and go to sleep myself, so…”

Sion took a step forward. One single step towards the door.

But then the dull sound of a beating rang through the room several times in quick succession.

“Kghbah.”

Sion collapsed with a super lame sound, unconscious.

Ferris was standing across from him, the same as always. She sheathed her sword.  

“…Ah… a, ah..”

Ryner tried to scream, but it just wouldn’t come out. He didn’t even see Ferris move. It was like she’d teleported to knock Sion down - one second he was there, and the next, Ferris was gone, and there was that sound, and then Sion was dead on the floor.

And now…

“Geez, you two! Always playing your childish little pranks! ♡”

Ferris turned around, wearing a drop-dead gorgeous smile. It was far removed from her usual expressionlessness. It was a smile beautiful beyond words.

Why was it so damn beautiful when pretty people smiled? Ryner wondered. And why was it so damn scary when Ferris specifically smiled?

Ryner felt like he was going to cry. It was getting to the point where he feared he’d develop a phobia of smiles.

“It’s widdle Ryner’s turn now, isn’t it?” Ferris said way too happily.

Ryner took a step back. “U-u-u-uh, um, I don’t know what’s going through your head right now, but it literally wasn’t my fault this time.”

“Oh, reeeaally?”

“Y, yeah, real—”

 “Oh, reeeaally?”

“No, um…”

“Oh, reeeaally?”

“…Auughh…”

“Oh, reeeaally?”

“Auughhh, yeah I knew that wasn’t gonna work. Alright, go for it. But can you make it as painless as p—”

 The same dull sound rang out.

“Kghbah.” Ryner collapsed with the same ugly sound that Sion had made.

“Know the pain you made the Dango God feel!” Ferris said.

Well, at least Sion would get some sleep like this. And so would Ryner.

He lost consciousness.

---

The next day was also sunny.

The sky, red as the sun set, was completely free of clouds.

It really made him want to sleep.

Ryner had slept through the night after Ferris knocked him out, then woke up on the floor of Sion’s office, took a bath, and then began to work. It had been ten hours of nonstop work since then. Even now he continued to push through the work on his desk single-mindedly.

Then he yawned. Rolled his neck. Closed his tired eyes again and again. Then he leaned his back on his chair and sighed.

Today was exactly the same as yesterday. The world around him was exactly the same today as it was yesterday. 

The night’s sleep had little impact on Sion’s perpetual exhaustion. He was working just as hard as always.

Ferris was in her corner, dango in one hand, a book titled The Two MILFs’ Autumn Leaf Colored Picnic in the other, whatever that was supposed to be, her face red as she uttered the occasional “Wh, what!” and “U-u-u-unbelievable!” as she flipped the pages.

Everything was the exact same as it always was.

“Everything’s way too samey nowadays,” Ryner said.

“……”

Sion didn’t respond. He was absorbed in his work, his pen racing along his papers just like always.

Ryner shrugged, then turned to Ferris instead. “Hey, Ferris. My throat’s dry. Can I have some of your tea?”

“…U, unbelievable… So Sarah and Berkelle were secretly keeping a pet bird together!?”

“Which part of that am I supposed to be surprised by?” Ryner asked.

But it didn’t reach Ferris. She was too deep into her novel.

“…The hell, no one wants to talk to me,” Ryner mumbled. 

“……”

“……”

No answer.

“Hm. Well, I guess it’s good that things are peaceful…”

Ryner stood up, went over to Ferris, and helped himself to a cup of her tea. He looked around the room as he drank it. He was extremely familiar with the room by now, to the point where he knew where all the stains on the walls were. But that was obvious by now. Anyone’d notice all the marks and stains if they worked in the same little room for over a year straight.

A year straight.

“…A year, huh?”

It sure went by fast.

Usually when he had to do something he didn’t want to do, it took forever for time to pass. But when he looked back, the whole last year was a flash. It went by unbelievably quickly.

That meant… that it was actually really fun, right?

“No way,” Ryner mumbled to himself and smiled wryly.

It was a year of Sion pushing him around and Ferris bullying him. Fun? He couldn’t help but laugh at the thought.

“…Hey,” Ryner said to them.

But they were both busy so they didn’t respond.

It felt a little - just a little - lonely.

“Haha…”

What an odd feeling. A long time ago… he was always alone. And it felt so obvious to him. Like he should be alone. If he wasn’t everyone just yelled that he was a monster anyway. He believed it, too. Believed that he was a monster. He gave up on everything, and that was just how it was.

But nowadays if his friends ignored him for a little bit he felt lonely. 

“…Hahaha.” 

He drank the rest of his tea and sat back down at his desk, picked his pen up, and got back to work even though it was such a pain. He never would’ve done this in the past. It would’ve been too much of a pain. But he forced himself to keep with it now.

Why? For who? Well, he already had his answer.

It was for himself. Because he’d found the place where he belonged. It was here in this country, in Roland, in this office.

He belonged here with the meanspirited king and extremely troublesome woman.

When he was here, he felt like he could work for the sake of the world. He wanted to do things for other people. He wanted to do things for himself.

“……”

When he was here, a year passed in the blink of an eye.

That was why.

“I, I’m dooooneee!” Sion suddenly yelled.

“Huh?”

Sion held a stack of documents up, his face full of disbelief. “I, I’m done! Look!”

“With what?” Ryner asked. “Which proposal? Let me guess. If you’re that happy, it’s gotta be that you found a good solution for Pengram’s cost petition, right?”

That was their toughest problem right now. Sion’s efforts only made it worse and worse, to the point where the nobles were threatening mass suicide. It was super frustrating, especially since they couldn’t very well call them out on their lie. And if they just ignored it, then the nobility would get even more angry with Sion. So they had to resolve it. But how? They needed a firm but gentle answer, the kind that’d satisfy kids throwing tantrums.

“Did you finally figure out how to deal with that?” Ryner asked.

Sion shook his head. “It’s not that.”

“Then what is it?”

Sion said it so quietly that Ryner only caught the tail end: “…ng.”

“Aah? Say it louder. What’d you finish?”

“…Everything,” Sion said. “I’ve dealt with all my urgent business.”

“Wh, what? That’s…”

Sion smiled. “I can take a week off.”

“Y, you’re kidding.”

“No, I’m serious.”

“Whaaat!? But, but normally you’d say ‘I was lying!! We’re actually working ten days without sleeping starting now!’ and…”

 “No, no. I’ve really, truly dealt with all of our pressing domestic matters…”

“So we’re done?”

“Yeah.”

“Seriously?”

“Seriously,” Sion said, mimicking Ryner’s tone, and nodded.

A year ago, Sion had said that Roland’s problems were completely unmanageable. If they were late to address any one of them, everything would fall into disarray, so he had to work without breaks, going so far as to bring his own body to the brink of exhaustion. That was why Ryner was helping out.

“I-it’s all done?” Ryner said.

“Yeah. It’s done. The country’s stable.”

“Th, then my work’s also…”

Sion smiled happily. Yes, he still looked tired. But he genuinely looked pleased, too. “You can take a month off.”

“You’re kidding me.”

“I’m serious.”

“No waaaay!!”

Sion smiled bitterly. “I’m telling the truth here. Thank you for helping me so much up to this point. You’ve really done a lot for me. You don’t need to work that hellish schedule now, so… I might have you help with negotiations abroad or something later instead.”

“Oh, then, um, I don’t have to stay up all night anymore? And, um, I can sleep whenever I want to? Hey, are you serious?” Ryner asked. He’d completely lost any sense of composure from his excitement.

He’d been forced to work that hellish schedule for a whole year now, after all. But now it was coming to an abrupt end. Everything would be okay now.

“Is it really okay for such a happy thing to happen to us?” Ryner wondered.

“Hahaha. I’m surprised too. To think that we managed to deal with everything that came at us until now,” Sion said. Then he took a deep breathe in, then out. And smiled. “Ryner.”

“Hm?”

“Thank you.”

“It’s gross if you say it too much.”

Sion laughed again, then stood up and stretched. “Now, then. I’m going to step away from politics for a bit. What about you?”

Ryner looked down at the documents on his desk. “Um, I’ve still got two things I need to work on…”

“Don’t worry about those. I can have someone else do them. You can take a break.”

“Really?”

“I already told you that I’m serious, didn’t I?” Sion asked with a smile. But it was a forced, pained smile.

“…No, I mean… it’s just two things, right? I can just do them myself…”

“No, it’s okay. I’ll tell Calne about it, so leave it to him and take it easy.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.”

“Uh… but like, I really get the feeling that this is a trap and you’re actually gonna have me stay up for ten days straight—”

“That again…? It’s nothing like that. Really,” Sion promised.

“You’re seriously serious? Uh, then… okay, I’m gonna go back to my place and sleep then.

“Yeah. Eat something nice and get a good night’s sleep,” Sion said. “Just take it easy.”

Ryner shot him a distrusting look. “I kinda… feel like you’re scheming something when you tell me to take it easy,” he admitted.

“I suppose I’ll have to think of a devious plan to set things straight then—”

“No! Don’t make this into a massive pain in the ass!” Ryner said and stood. Apparently their work was really done. He tidied up the documents on his desk, then pushed it into the corner. “Alright, I’m going now.”

Sion nodded and pulled his wallet out of his pocket. “Do you have money for food?” 

“Some old lady will take pity on me.”

“Haha. Which one?” Sion asked.

“No one.”

“Do you want some money?”

“I do,” Ryner said.

“Here,” Sion said and took a few gold coins out of his wallet, then tossed them.

Ryner caught them.

“Why don’t you and Ferris go on a date or something?” Sion asked.

“…No, I’d really rather Ferris didn’t come with. I wanna eat and sleep and be lazy,” Ryner said and grimaced over at the corner Ferris was in.

As expected, she was still engrossed in her novel and didn’t notice them talking about her at all.

Ryner nodded, satisfied. “See? She doesn’t want to eat with me either.”

Sion smiled mischievously. “Still, though. You two sure do get along well.” 

“What part of people getting along do the swords and hitting come in?”

“Hm. Well, when you’re into that—”

“Ugh, I’m leaving!” Ryner said, tired.

Sion looked hurt. “So that’s how you treat someone who just gave you money? You only want me for my riches, don’t you!?”

“Die!”

“Ahaha. Well, I’d better get ready. I have secret rendezvous to ruin.”

“Hey, how come you don’t feel any remorse when all you say is shit people hate hearing?” Ryner asked.

Sion laughed. “Well, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Yeah,” Ryner said with a nod. He watched until Sion was out of sight.

“……”

Then he sat back down at his desk.

He and Ferris were the only ones in the room now. But Ferris was absolutely engrossed in her novel, so it was really quiet.

“…Hm.”

Ryner tidied his papers again, then he picked up the pens that were scattered across the top and put them in the drawer where they belonged.

“…Hm,” he said again. There was nothing else to do. His work was done. There was nothing to do.

“…Hey, Ferris?”

For some reason, Ferris responded this time. “What?”

“What do you think?”

“Of what?”

“I’ve got some money.”

“Hm.”

“I don’t have any work to do now, so do you wanna come with me and get something to eat?”

Ferris set her book aside, then looked at him with her piercingly clear blue eyes.

“What do you think?” Ryner repeated.

“There’s no way the bully king with the world’s worst personality told you to go sleep and gave you money.”

“Right?”

Something was fishy. Every time something like this had happened over the past year, it ended with Sion giving him an unprecedented amount of work as some kind of sick joke.

Ryner looked down at the coins in his palm. “He said to go on a date with this money.”

“And if you do, he’ll probably kill you.”

“Right… It’s definitely a trap.”

“…No, wait,” Ferris said. “He knows that him telling us to do something will make us not want to do it. Maybe he’s actually hoping that we don’t go to eat together?”

 “Ah, yeah, that might be it. It could be a trap that’ll hit harder if we do our own things.”

“Right?”

“Yeah. So what should we do? Eat together? Or not?”

“Uuh? Hmm…” Ferris crossed her arms in thought.  

Ryner thought back to Sion, looking back in the doorframe. “So do you think it’s true?”

“What?”

“What he said about work. Do you think it’s really done?”

“Five percent is done.”

“I was thinking two,” Ryner said.

“…Hm. I haven’t been involved in it, so I don’t really know,” Ferris said. “But that’s what you think?”

Ryner crossed his arms. “Hmm… well, honestly, things have been going really well lately… We don’t have any urgent issues to attend to, and most of the tough problems have already been wrapped up too. Like, things are good, but… it’s Sion, you know?”

“Mm. It’s Sion,” Ferris agreed.

Yeah. The workaholic Shitty Asstal.

“Eat something nice and get a good night’s sleep. Just take it easy.”

That just had to be… 

“A trap,” Ryner said.

Ferris nodded. “A trap.”

“So what should we do?” Ryner asked.

“Mhmhmhm.”

“Man, why’s his personality so terrible?”

“Hm. Well, you two are the same breed, so…”

“Wait, are you trying to flip this so it’s my fault?”

“Of course. 820% of the world’s problems start with you,” Ferris said.

“Huh? Really?”

“Will you repent?”

“Umm.”

“You are not permitted to go home until you repent!”

“…Uh, oh, so… um, we’re starting to have really different conversations here, so… I’m just gonna get back to the point,” Ryner said, tired. “Do you want to eat together or not?”

“Hm. I’m in the mood for curry today,” Ferris said.

“Huuh? I want patties.”

“Fool. Today is a curry day.”

“…I mean, I guess that’s fine…”

Ryner stood up. Apparently they were gonna eat together after all. He slipped the gold coins into his pocket, and opened the door. “Hey, Ferris.”

“Mm?”

“Know anywhere that they make curry and patties?” He asked. He turned the light off after Ferris left, leaving the room dark.

---

Ryner and Ferris left the room and took a left towards a staircase that’d bring them down.

But if they had taken a right once they got outside of the door, then walked down the hall and made another right… 

“……”

Sion was crouched on the ground. His head was throbbing like it’d break open, and his chest felt like it was being torn in half. He couldn’t speak. He couldn’t even whimper.

The gears inside of him were turning. The cursed contract inside of him was progressing. His flesh was mad, no longer human.

“…a, ah, augh…”

He finally managed a groan. He felt like he was going to throw up, and not just the contents of his stomach. He felt like he had to throw it all up, his organs, his muscles, all of his flesh.

But not even blood would come up anymore. Because his cells had all rotted into something esle entirely. Because he was assimilating.

The end was fast approaching. His choice was fast approaching.

Three years had passed since he made that contract. One year had passed since Ryner came home.

That was a long time. A terribly long time. With every living moment as painful as it was, time was maddeningly slow. Yet this past year felt so fast.

“……”

Sion’s lips formed a little smile.

It really went by in the blink of an eye. 

Ryner came home. Ferris came back.

“……”

And then all he did… was smile. He forgot about the pain. They just made him so happy.

“……Ha, haha, hahaha…”

It was a fleeting dream, but he still wished it’d continue forever. He wanted to see that fake peace forever. He wanted every day to be the same. It was so comfortable. That was why it was over so quickly.

But just a little more. He wanted a little more time.

He’d take the pain without complaining. Just let him dream of that fake tranquility a little longer.

“…I dreamed a stupid dream,” Sion said, on the verge of tears.

It was only natural that his fake peace would eventually crumble. It was only natural that a happy illusion would eventually fade. But he still—

“……It’s over, isn’t it?” Sion said.

“Yeah,” a clear voice said from nowhere. “It’s over.”

Sion pressed a hand to his chest to try to shove the pain back down and raised his head. “I… am I wrong? Lucile.”

“…The hero is never wrong,” Lucile said.

The hero is never wrong, he said.

The hero.

The hero, huh… 

Dry laughter escaped Sion’s lips. “Hahah.”

The hero, he said. He called it a ‘hero.’

“It’s just a monster,” Sion said.

“……”

Lucile didn’t answer.

Sion used the hallway’s wall to support his weight as he sat up. He stared into space with an empty expression no different from a soulless doll’s.

Everything changed, Sion thought. Everything was different now.

His body, his heart, the world, his hopes, his dreams.

Everything changed. Nothing went how he wanted it to.

Even though he was supposed to have chosen the best path possible. Even though this was supposed to be the most efficient path with the fewest sacrifices possible.

“…Nothing. I didn’t get a single thing that I wanted…”

Sion raised his hand. It glittered a faint gold, proof that the curse was running through his veins - the so-called holy curse of the mad hero.  

No one would mistake that hero for human. So he wasn’t human anymore either.

“……”

But… he didn’t have any regrets.

He made the choices that he felt were necessary. There weren’t any other paths that he could have taken.

The word was a warped, mad place. It just hid its rot in the dark.

He had to keep it at bay. He needed the power to keep it at bay. That was why Sion made the choice he did.

That was the only reason he needed to throw his life away. That was the only reason he needed to sell his friend’s soul. That was why he had no regrets.

And yet.

“……”

Ryner smiled. Ferris smiled. And his heart wavered.

Just a little longer, his heart screamed. Just let him dream so happily for a little longer.

They smiled and laughed like such idiots. They laughed at the dumbest things. 

Ferris could fight him and verbally abuse him and skip work to go eat dango all she wanted. He’d let her do it happily. He had no regrets.

Ryner said that the world he created wasn’t just a pipe dream after all.

“……”

But actually… it was.

Everything was a lie. Despair was overflowing from every corner. And he’d sold Ryner’s life off.

Sion’s power wasn’t enough. He couldn’t do anything alone.

And yet… those two said it was okay. They said that he already worked hard enough.

If that was true… then please, give him a little longer to dream.

“……”

Sion’s mind went blank.

He raised his hand to his cheek to feel his meaningless tears.

Even his tears were an inhuman color.

It didn’t matter how much he struggled. This was the end. The time had come.

The time of the contract. The time to push forward. And the time to make the choice that was always looming ahead of him.

It was the worst possible decision to have to make.

Should he choose his buddy, or the world?

“……”

Sion balled his hand into a tight fist.

His buddy, or the world? His buddy, or the world?

He had to decide. He was the one who had to make this decision.

He’d always been the one to make decisions like this.

He squeezed his hand into a tight fist, as if meaning to crush his falling tears. As if to crush his own heart.

He squeezed it tightly, painfully closed, as if to silence his own screams— 

“Now, shall I save the world?”

He’d make a choice. He had to.

It didn’t matter if he was crying. He had to make the most correct choice. He had to take the path of fewest casualties. He had to save as many lives as possible.

By all of those metrics, the world carried more weight than the life of his friend.

The choice would be hurt. It was unavoidable. But he still had to make that choice.

And yet. And yet— 

“I won’t let you.”

It wasn’t a voice that echoed in reality. It wasn’t Lucile, either.

But it was a familiar voice. One he knew all too well.

It was his voice. The voice inside of him. The voice of the other him.

It was the voice of his weak self as his mind was eaten away by the sword.

“I won’t let you do whatever you want,” it said.

“…Haha. What can a fading fake like you actually do?”

“Don’t fuck with me. You’re the fake here.”

“No, that’d be you.”

“It’s you.”

Their droll dialogue continued in their matching voices. It was a pointless exchange at its core.

“……”

Sion’s eyes narrowed.

The truth was that they were both fakes. The ‘real’ one would come from them joining together, becoming one. Since they’d be the same in the end, who took charge now hardly made a difference.

Even so.

“…You’re going to lose either way,” he said.

“I… have no intention of losing to you,” the other Sion argued.

“…Heh, heheh…”

“What’s so funny!?” His heart screamed.

“Heheh, hahaha, hahahahaha.”

He laughed madly, with his voice that’d been on the verge of tears for so long. Even now he sounded like he’d cry.

“I’m asking you what’s so funny!” His heart yelled.

“You, who are always running away… can’t win against me,” Sion answered.

“You’re the one who’s running!” His heart yelled, his tone stronger than before.

“You are.”

“You are! You’re always making excuses, saying that you’re making the right choice, that you’re saving the world, so that you can justify selling Ryn—”

“Shut up!”

“You’re the one who needs to shut up! I’m not like you. I won’t give up on Ryner. I’ll save h—”

“Shut up shut up shut up! That pipe dream makes me want to fucking barf! You can’t save him! All you do is run from your choice, run from fear, run from pain! You can’t do anything! I’ve made our choice! I’m moving forward! I won’t let you get in my way!”

“I won’t let you! I’ll save Ryn—”

“You can’t save him!”

“I can.”

“You can’t! Show me how you’ll do it! If you can really save him, then show me how! Show me how you’ll save Ryner from the dark. I know you can’t do it. You can’t save him. If you could… if we could, then I’d have saved him long ago!!” Sion screamed and cradled his chest in his hand.

Even though he already should have made his choice, tears were once again pouring from his eyes. Even though he was supposed to be resolved to do what needed to be done.

It was as if the choice he’d already made had crumbled in front of him. His tears…

“…Despite everything, I’m going to save Ryner,” the other Sion said in a low tone. “You’re the one who’s going to disappear.”

“…Can you really do it?” Sion asked as the tears poured down his face.

“I can.”

“Liar.”

“Watch me, okay?”

“…You’re lying. You can’t do it. You can’t… we can’t… we can’t kill him…”

“We can,” his heart said. “I’ll kill Ryner and save him before he falls into the endless darkness. You sleep through it. I’ll… I’ll end it all.”

And then Sion— 

And then his heart— 

“……”

Shared a moment of silence as they once again felt the urge to cry.

It didn’t matter which choice they made… They’d regret doing it either way.

He heard another voice. But not one from within. This time it was one from outside of his mind: Lucile, bright and cheerful.

“Aah, it’s about time,” Lucile said. “Soon. Because you don’t have any more time to hesitate. You’ll change and become my true master. The savior of this world… now. Now,” he said. “Now, I wonder which of you won?”

“……”  

Sion raised his head and smiled sadly.

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Intermission: Regarding Eternity

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The distant horizon was slowly reddening. It looked like the sun would set soon.

“…It’s like,” Ryner whispered as he watched it. “It’s almost like… a pipe dream’s turned real over there.” He was standing on the roof of Roland Castle, the highest point in the country and the best place to watch the approaching dawn from. All of Roland seemed to shine with the sun’s red.

He looked to the man beside him, Sion Astal. He was Ryner’s buddy… no, his shitty friend? His bad influence. Either way, he was the young king of their country. He looked a little tired. But that obvious. He was always working like he was possessed for the sake of his country, even going so far as to drag Ryner in. They were on their fifth shared all-nighter in a row.

Ryner felt like he was going to die. He was seriously at his limit.

They’d both gotten killer headaches, so that’s why they decided to come out to the rooftop to breathe some fresh air.

“…The fresh air’s not helping my headache at all,” Ryner said.

Sion smiled bitterly. “I know, right?”

“Should we just sleep?”

“No, if we take a break, we’ll veer off schedule,” Sion said.

Ryner grimaced. “You’re more worried about your schedule than your life?”

“…No, well, you know…”

Sion looked back out at the rising sun. Little by little, it got brighter, its light spreading from the castle town and to the distant plains and mountain range. He looked past it all.

Ryner followed Sion’s gaze. His eyes narrowed at the sight.

This scenery was all it took for him to understand that this country was different from the mad Roland of the previous era. A few years had passed since Sion pledged to heal this broken country, and it was clear that it had really changed in that time. The townspeople were livelier, the streets cleaner and well-maintained, the rivers managed to better control flooding. All in all, it was just an easier place to live in.

If one walked through town, everyone always looked like they were enjoying themself. They all said, “Living in this country can be enjoyable thanks to Lord Astal.”

This wasn’t the mad Roland the last king had ruled over. This was now a country where people believed that they could be happy if they did their best. It had changed rapidly since Sion took the throne. Yet Sion always said that it wasn’t enough. He was always looking far past the horizon, searching for ways to make people even happier.

Sion worked himself to death to answer everyone’s heavy expectations of him. He’d been doing that nonstop for the several months since Ryner had returned to Roland, working as if he were possessed so that the country would continue to change for the better day after day.

“…A pipe dream,” Ryner said quietly.

“Hm? A pipe dream?”

Ryner didn’t clarify. He just watched darkness fall on Roland, thinking of the past.

It was the time just after he met Sion, when this country was still mad. They hadn’t yet lost anything in those days. Kiefer was there. Tyle, Tony, Fahle, and the others were all still alive, too.

It was the day before they were supposed to go to the battlefield. They’d set out for it first thing in the morning.

That day, Sion was shaking with fear. What should he do to keep his friends from dying? Had he chosen the right path? Could he protect them? Was he looking at the world the right way?

He’d shivered with fear in the library in the middle of the night, questioning himself.

Sion was still like that. He always took responsibility for everything all by himself, carrying burdens heavy enough to crush him. Even if he was so alone that he felt like he was going to die, he forced a smile and pretended to be okay so that no one would see his suffering.

Ryner could still remember the conversation he and Sion had in that dark library vividly.

“…I plan to be promoted through the ranks without losing anyone,” Sion had said.

“Hm. You’re so greedy,” Ryner had replied as if he had no interest.

“Yeah.”

“…Aren’t you tired?” Ryner had asked.

“Would you keep it secret from everyone if I answered that honestly?”

“Nope.”

“Then I won’t answer.”

“You’re definitely tired then,” Ryner had said, tired.

Sion had smiled, but it soon faded to a more honest expression. “But I think there’s worth in this. I told you before, right? I’m going to change this country.”

“What’re you gonna do it to?”

“Make it so everyone can smile.”

“Hmm.”

“This country has to change. It isn’t equal in the slightest; the strong subjugate the weak to their hearts’ content, and the fighting—”

“You told me that before, too. It’s like paradise. Honestly, it sounds like a pipe dream to me…”

Yes. A pipe dream.

He couldn’t think of it as anything else back then.

They’d lived under a mad king and mad nobility inside of a mad country. Everything was so crazy that he hadn’t been able to believe that it could really change.

But Sion hadn’t left it at that.

“I’ll make this pipe dream into a reality. Don’t you think it’d be worth it? I mean, it’s not like it doesn’t affect you. You’re an Alpha Stigma bearer. All it takes is for someone to say that for them to all be afraid of you, hate you. You can’t live like that.”